but it’s my poo!

I remember sitting up immediately when I heard it; “My poo! Not your poo!” Then I heard the next part; “No it’s MY poo!” Cue me practically falling over my own feet (again) in my rush to get downstairs, in the hopes that I wasn’t going to find a bedroom covered in that first morning poo, times two.

I was very relieved to discover that there was in fact no poo, from either Alex or Maddie. But hearing them argue as to whose poo it actually was, had me run the fastest I have ever run in my 31 years. Please understand that I have experienced poo in the cupboard, poo in the lounge, poo on the dog (don’t ask), poo in my bed and poo in the kitchen. We also won’t talk about my car or the bath.

Yes. This is a post about poo. Baby poo.

And I’m so relieved that it is this short.

G

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getting bread and milk with the kids vs getting bread and milk without the kids

With Kids

1. Pack a baby bag. Forget that your wet wipes are finished, and only pack 1 nappy each. Should be enough. Forget the juice bottles and snacks, because irritable children are such delights in the car.
2. Wrestle 2 toddlers into their car seats, all whilst yelling for your eldest to unglue her face from the tv and get into the car.
3. Once everyone is buckled in, drive off. Stop 20m down the road to turn around and fetch your purse on the kitchen counter.
4. Get to the shopping centre, where the “mom & tots” parking is taken up by non-moms & tots. Eventually find a parking 14km away from the mall entrance.
5. Realising that you’ve also forgotten the pram/stroller, you grab the closest trolley and load all 3 kids in. The eldest inevitably jumps out in the middle of the parking lot to “beat you inside”. The other two are now pulling each other’s hair. Great.
6. Walk into the shop, and instantly start cursing yourself for going out with all 3 kids, all whilst 4 little hands are grabbing every breakable in sight. The other 2 medium sized hands are sizing up the toy aisle. You just walk past.
7. Finally make it to the bread section, after having made a detour down the snack aisle, as 2 shrieking babies does not a fun shopping trip make. Ensure security isn’t watching you as you rip open the packet of chips, and basically throw it at said babies. Grab a loaf of bread.
8. Remove said bread loaf from the trolley, after babies decide that it’s just so interesting, and that they must stand on it. And poke it. And throw it on the floor. Remember that you have a 3rd child still in the toy aisle.
9. Shimmy on over to the toy aisle. Grab eldest child’s hand and drag her away, all whilst trying not to trip over her bottom lip that has suddenly grown 3ft and is now dragging on the floor.
10. Make a u-turn into the dairy aisle, and grab 2 bottles of milk. Place said milk into the trolley with the babies. Very quickly remove said milk bottles. Hand loaf of bread to the eldest child who acts like it’s 50kg and is under immense torture. Hook a bottle of milk onto each pinky finger, and push the trolley to the checkout.
11. Wait until the cashier is clear before offloading your 3 items onto her till, as 3 pairs of hands are now grabbing sweets and chocolates and magazines and all of the other wonderful things lined up at the till section. Again, curse yourself for going out with all 3 kids.
12. Pay for your 3 4 (forgot the chips didn’t I) items, and take off like an F1 car from the till, as the chips are now finished and the babies now want EVERYTHING. This is when you realise that your wet wipes are finished, as the babies managed to get more chips in their hair and between their fingers than in their mouths.
13. Make it back to the car that is 14km away, giving a silent air punch that you survived. Offload the 1 shopping bag into the car, and wrestle the 2 babies into their car seats.
14. Remember that you have another child that is not in the car, and bundle her in quickly, side-eyeing everyone just to make sure that they didn’t see her ambling around the car, alone. Realise that there is a smell wafting from 2 little bottoms, but knowing that you have no wet wipes, you block out the smell and turn a blind eye.
15. Drive home, trying to ignore the whining babies who want the juice that you forgot at home, and the drop lip of the eldest who didn’t get the toy that she wanted. Promise that you’re never EVER going shopping with all 3 kids (alone) ever again.

Without Kids

1. Park in the first available parking, grab your purse, walk into the shop, walk to the bread aisle, grab a loaf, walk to the dairy aisle, grab 2 bottles of milk, walk to the till, pay and go home.

Yep. Pretty much covers it.

G

me

Hi. My name is Genevieve. I am 30 years old, a wife, mom to 3, daughter to an amazing mommy, cousin to many, niece and friend. But that sounds so generic, as so many people are parents, siblings, spouses… So I’ve decided to share a little more about myself (eeek); so here goes…

Secretary vibes...

Secretary vibes…

By day (Monday-Friday), I am a secretary to a very busy Factory Manager. I love my job, I love my boss, I love my colleagues and I love my company. I can honestly say that I look forward to work every day. Yes, I have my boring, monotonous moments, but I’ve seen just what a team and family we all are, especially in the last few months, and I’m so very grateful for such an amazing support team. I took this job back in 2013 having never been a secretary or PA before, and this being my 2nd big corporate company to work for. I left the comfort of my job for the past 5 years to experience something new, and I’m so glad that I did. For those who know me well, they know that I do not adjust well to change, and especially having become so comfortable in my previous job, this was a huge step for me. But I took that step, and I’ve never looked back.

By night (and sometimes by day, on the weekends) I am a waitress. I work part-time for a mobile bar

Waitressing vibes...

Waitressing vibes…

and events company, and even though the hours can be crazy long sometimes, I love it. My bosses are awesome, I’ve worked for and with some really amazing people, and I’ve met some great new friends. My little car and I have driven from the North Coast to the South Coast, in the rain and at night, in the boiling sun and in the wee hours of the morning. I’ve dropped staff at home, waited for their lifts, and had far too many laughs and giggles to even think about work. I have had maybe 1-2 functions where I’ve seriously considered just leaving, but that’s just not in my nature. So with a smile on my face, I serve. I laugh. I interact. I mingle. And sometimes, I even party a little. Seriously awesome 2nd job.

Bubble vibes...

Bubble vibes…

My weekends (every Saturday and the odd Sunday) are spent at a flea market, selling BUBBLES. Yes, bubbles. The hugest, most awesomest (yes I know that’s not a word) bubbles EVER! Seriously, best. job. EVER. It doesn’t matter how young or old you are; you cannot not smile when you see bubbles! And the best part about my 3rd job, is that I get to have some one-on-one time with Morgan-Lee, something that has been seriously lacking in the past 18 months or so. Watching her run around, having fun, interacting with the other kids, just being a kid herself makes me so damn happy. I’ve met some really interesting people, have spent far more money than I’ve made, and am absolutely loving it. It’s hard work; it’s quite a physical job setting up at the market and then packing up at the end of the day, but I’m out of the house. I’m around other adults; I’m socialising *gasp*. I’m rediscovering my fun and extroverted side, my flamboyance and zest for life. And I get to play with bubbles. It’s a no-brainer really 😉

For the other 24 hours in a day (see what I did there) I am mom. Mommy. Mom. Mama. *scream* *squeal* Mommy. Mom. Mom. MOM!! In between those 24 hours, I somehow find time to be a wife (not a very domesticated one as the husband makes supper most nights, does homework but I mean hey. I try 😉 ) I’m a terrible friend in that I will generally only message or contact someone if they’ve messaged or contacted me, but my friends know that if they need me, I’m there. No matter the time, whether it’s day or night. I’ll be there. Over the years my list of friends has whittled down, partly because I just haven’t stayed in touch with people but I think it’s more to do with the fact that the friends that I have in my life right now, are who I need in my life right now. I have loads of acquaintances and friends, but only a handful or 2 of really close, can-we-move-in-with-you-if-we-get-evicted friends. And I couldn’t ask for anything more.

My life - Alex, Morgan-Lee &; Maddie (picture courtesy of Krystal Temlett Photography)

My life – Alex, Morgan-Lee & Maddie (picture courtesy of Krystal Temlett Photography)

This year has been tough on me, tough on my family. This year has not only shown me how strong I am, but also how weak I am. That I am not superwoman. I am not supermom. I am just trying to get through every day, alive. These hardships that we as a family have experienced this year will fade. They are only temporary. We will come out of this stronger. I will come out of this stronger. For the first time in I don’t know how long, I asked for help. That was a huge step for me. Huge.

I’m exhausted. I’m tired. I’m broke. I’m happy. This is my life right now, and instead of moping and complaining and hating the world for it, I choose to embrace it. I am working my backside off for those I love, and who love me in return. I am becoming stronger, re-energised, and happier. This year has been hard, I can’t deny it. But I refuse to let it get the better of me. I refuse to let it define who I am as a person, a wife, a mother, a daughter, a friend.

I will learn, I have learnt, and for that, I am grateful.

G

no please don’t cry… again…

I’m tired. No. I’m exhausted. I’m so exhausted that I’m tired. I don’t even remember what a full night’s sleep is, let alone half a night’s sleep.

Maddie has always been the better sleeper, niggling once at about 2am or so, but then settling very quickly after I give her her bottle. Alex has always been my little terrorist; on a good night he wakes 3-4 times, a bad night sees him not sleeping at all. But for the past 3 nights, Maddie has been even worse than him.

Alex has this terrible habit of shrieking at 2am; I’m talking straight-through-your-eardrum kinda shriek. Most mornings I can get to him before he starts shrieking, so that I can take him through to the lounge, where I fight with him to settle for anywhere up to an hour, and then he usually either lies quietly on my chest, or passes out. But he really battles to settle down, and most of the time I put him into the cot that we’ve got in the lounge, and I curl up on the couch. Somehow Maddie has cottoned onto this, and whilst she doesn’t shriek like Alex, she has woken up 4 times each night for the past 3 nights. So where I usually just have 1 baby to try and settle, there’s me in the lounge with both of them, rocking and bouncing, trying to stop them from pushing themselves out of my arms, and also trying not to lose it completely.

This morning was no different; I ended up in the lounge with Alex at about 3am, after finally getting Maddie settled for the 2nd time. I sat with Alex for about 30mins, but he had no intention of falling asleep in my arms. At about 4am, I put him into the cot in the lounge with a juice bottle, and he lay down drinking it. I then curled up on the couch and waited. At about 5am I woke up, almost in a panic. Maddie was niggling in the bedroom. Now I do generally know which niggle I can ignore, and which I need to tend to ASAP; this niggle however had me a bit lost. I lay on the couch and waited… and waited… and waited. After about 5mins or so she stopped, and I breathed a huge sigh of relief. Then I almost smacked myself for almost waking Alex up, as he had fallen asleep in the cot by the couch. And all I could think of when I was listening to Maddie niggle?

Please don’t cry again. Please don’t wake up. Please please please. I don’t actually know if I can deal with it.

At 5am this morning I was fighting back tears; big, fat, wet tears, at the thought of having to raise my exhausted body off of the couch, to go and see to Maddie. Maddie has slept through once in almost 13 months; Alex never has. In the last 7 years my sleeping pattern has deteriorated to the point where I wake at anything, but the past 2 years have been pretty awful; basically my pregnancy with the twins and the subsequent months. What sounds like bliss to me? A night alone; just me and a huge comfy bed. Will that ever happen? Not in the foreseeable future!

Now some will see me as ungrateful, a bad mom, whatever. Think what you want. I love my children (not that I have anything to justify to anyone but anyway…) with all that I am, and even though I don’t know if I could have handled getting up to see to Maddie this morning if she needed me to, I know that I would have. Because I’m her mommy. And we do what seems like the impossible sometimes, because it’s ingrained in our souls, in our beings as mommy’s.

My life - Alex, Morgan-Lee & Maddie (picture courtesy of Krystal Temlett Photography)

My life – Alex, Morgan-Lee & Maddie (picture courtesy of Krystal Temlett Photography)

No, parenting isn’t all unicorn parties and sparkles. It’s an exhausting, frustrating, depressing, anger inducing journey, that has sob-fest tendencies, with a sideline of wine by the bucket load. But parenting is also getting to that point where you feel that you just cannot do it anymore, and something so simple as a hug, or a kiss on your forehead reminds you why you haven’t thrown the towel in just yet. A stick figure drawing (the 10th for the month) of the family, all smiling and holding hands. Sticky fingers asking you to share a biscuit. Learning how to clap hands, stand up and give a kiss.

An unexpected “I love you mommy”.

Listening to your son say “oh dear” when he throws his bottle out of the cot, because that’s what you do. (say oh dear, not throw his bottle out of the cot!)

Playing “ta” with your youngest, because she thinks it’s the best thing ever, and feeling so proud, because she ACTUALLY understands the concept.

Knowing that these 3 little people are from me, are a part of me.

Always.

G

Alex & Maddie - picture courtesy of Krystal Temlett Photography

Alex & Maddie – picture courtesy of Krystal Temlett Photography

on being a mom of 3, whilst holding onto the last tendrils of my sanity

I’ve been a mom to 3 kidlets for almost 13 months now. THIRTEEN MONTHS. 2 of those kidlets are the same age. Yeah, it’s been fun.

I’ve learnt quite a bit in the past few months, and I’d like to share those ‘learnings’ with you…

  1. Cars do indeed go on fumes. They don’t go for long, but they do go.
  2. If a poop has the slightest chance of escaping the nappy, it will. All over you.
  3. Dog food doesn’t hurt. It’s actually a great laxative. See point 2.
  4. Running into the shops for bread and milk wearing your old gym pants, a t-shirt covered in puke (I think that’s what it was) with greasy hair means that every cool person from high school will be there. At the same shop. At the same time.
  5. Sleeping in until 05h30 feels like a vacation.
  6. There is no chance of peeing in solitude. Even the 6 year old will find you.
  7. Showers consist of the 6 year old sitting on the toilet watching you whilst singing, all whilst you stick your head out every few minutes because you’re convinced that the 1 twin is killing the other twin and you’re listening out for the blood curdling screams.
  8. You regularly talk to yourself, so that you can have at least 1 adult conversation a day.
  9. You discover that, whilst you are indeed a sleep-deprived mombie, you are somehow able to (semi)function on 2 hours sleep. For 3 days in a row.
  10. Your love life consists of a kiss (which is more of a clashing of lips) before dissolving into your bed. See point 11.
  11. You very quickly learn that babies have an insanely accurate telepathic ability, which alerts them to when you do indeed plan on dissolving into your bed.
  12. You discover that certain antibiotics do indeed taste terrible. Especially when you’re spitting out the vomited version.
  13. The 6 year old WILL decide to tell you about their day (even though you did ask in the car on the way home) right at the very moment that both babies decide to quieten down, and you decide to attempt to watch MasterChef Australia. See point 11.
  14. You become very grateful for PVR. See point 13.
  15. Your sanity becomes highly questionable, and you’re the one doing the questioning.
  16. Gratefulness for those wee early hours is a new thing, because that is sometimes the only alone time there is. For about 3.8 seconds. Then it’s playtime. At 5am.
  17. Toasted sarmies become a very regular, VERY delicious meal. Mostly for supper.
  18. Date night is a dream come true, for the sole purpose of being able to sleep for 1.5 hours at the cinema, uninterrupted.
  19. Bath time becomes a firm favourite, as with all 3 kids in the bath splashing up a storm (sigh), you can finally catch up on the day. Until one kidlet screams blue murder. Which normally occurs within the first 3mins.
  20. As you reflect back on the crazy, exhausting, emotionally draining, financially draining, exhilarating, frustrating, tearful, laughter inducing time, you very quickly realise that you wouldn’t trade a single second.
  21. Well maybe that second 2 nights ago, when I got kicked in the boob during a nappy change. Again. I think I’d change that.

G

Picture courtesy of my mommy

Picture courtesy of my mommy