I regard myself as a blessed woman. I have 3 children who are generally healthy (apart from the odd runny nose or bum rash) and I had no issues whatsoever in conceiving them. In fact, my youngest 2 children were conceived at the same time, without any modern intervention at all! Needless to say, my factory was closed within minutes of our twins entering the world.
One of the many things that sets a woman apart from a man, is her ability to hold and nurture life in her womb. For so many women, this is sadly not to be. So many women and families spend thousands and thousands of Rands, Dollars, Pounds, even tens and hundreds of thousands in order to achieve the dream of a family, but it just doesn’t happen. IVF is normally the first step, followed then by maybe surrogacy, and then maybe adoption.
But there is another option.
I am an egg donor. I have been since 2011. I only recently told my mom about this, as I respect her thoughts and feelings on this subject, as with her childhood, I know that this is a sensitive topic for her. But she supports and applauds me, and that feels pretty damn awesome!
I am registered through an amazing agency called Nurture. I came across their website back in 2010, via an ad on Facebook of all places! By February 2011 I had been selected by a family, and my first donation process was under way.
It’s no walk in the park, I’ll tell you that right now. You are injecting yourself daily with hormones to increase YOUR hormone levels, to get your little ovaries to work overtime to produce more follicles, and ultimate more little eggies. You then have to get a rather nasty burning injection just before the eggs are retrieved, to stop your body from naturally ovulating them. So essentially you walk around like you’re 6 months pregnant for a few days. Well I did anyway!
Because of the current laws in our country, total anonymity is required. And that’s honestly ok with me. I don’t see it as giving up a child; I see it as giving away some of my DNA. I know that there are twin girls currently in the UK who were welcomed into this world in December 2011, because I was chosen. I am currently waiting to hear back from another recipient who chose me a few months back as to whether or not she will be a mommy soon. You see the thing with egg donation, is that it is not a sure-fix, guaranteed way to become a parent. There is still the possibility that the pregnancy will fail. What I find so amazing is that if it is a heterosexual couple, my eggs are fertilised with the father-to-be’s sperm, and then the fertilized follicle is inserted into the mother-to-be’s womb. Then if all goes well, a baby (or more) is welcomed into the world 9 or so months later. If it is a same-sex couple, then either 1 of the women will be the carrier, or there will be a surrogate involved.
I have given my consent for my follicles to be used for same-sex couples and heterosexual couples. You see, I don’t really care if a baby has 2 mommies or 2 daddies; all I care about is that that baby is loved and honoured and nurtured and protected. And the ladies at Nurture are so incredible; everyone (recipients and donors) are screened and asked intensive questions including full medical background and history, family background and history and and and.
Looking at my children, holding my children, welcoming my children into the world are the absolute highlights of my life. Yes I am tired, no make that exhausted. I’m broke, and frazzled and frustrated, and I cannot imagine my life without my 3 little people in it. The hugs, the kisses, the tantrums, the learning, the grasping, their lives forever entwined in mine.
I am about to embark on this journey again, and I am so excited. I have the opportunity to help complete a family.
I may not be able to end world famine or bring about world peace, but I can help to complete a family.
And I’m pretty ok with that.
*This is not a sponsored post. For more information about donating through the Nurture program, please have a look at their website via the link above.*