Things have been good recently. Not good financially, but good emotionally, mentally. I’ve been happy. I’ve been positive. I’ve been smiling. I’ve been ok.
I felt it when I woke up this morning. I felt it as I popped my pill before leaving for work. I felt it as I sipped on my first cup of tea. I felt it sitting behind my desk. I felt it.
My darkness is back. I don’t know for how long; a day, a night, a week, a month. All I know is that it’s back. And it’s rattled me. My shoulders feel heavy, my eyes dull. All I want to do is curl up in my bed, close my eyes and forget about everything.
I’ve known for a while that I have a darkness in my life, but I’ve never addressed it until recently, when I honestly didn’t have a choice. The darkness had all but consumed me a few short months ago, and I don’t want to feel like that again. But it’s a constant battle, one that I feel I may have lost for today.
The sun will rise tomorrow morning, and with it, a new day. A new day to take another step forward in pushing back my darkness. A new day to say, I am here.
I am still here.
This post was written in response to the Daily Prompt.