where did 2015 go?

Just hang on a second, I’m trying to figure out where the last 8 months have disappeared to. The twins are 6 months old, SIX MONTHS OLD. Not that I’m complaining, as the older they get, the more ‘adult’ food they eat, so the less (expensive) formula they drink!

Maddie & Alex - 6 months old!
Maddie & Alex – 6 months old!

But it feels like the year has just whizzed past me, and apart from the fact that I feel like the walking dead due to the lack of sleep I’m currently experiencing, I honestly don’t know where it’s all gone to. I can barely remember the first few weeks of the twins’ lives; it feel like it didn’t even happen. What I do know, is that it is possible for a human being to function on about 3 hours of sleep a night, if they’re lucky. And not to say how well things are going, because true’s nuts, it won’t.

Case in point.

Maddie has been sleeping through quite well for the past week or so. If she goes down at about 7pm, she’ll generally sleep through until about 5am. Yay! But I then went and gushed to some friends on Saturday about how happy I am that she’s been sleeping through, and BAM! Saturday and Sunday night she woke up about 2-3 times during the night. And then there’s of course her brother Alex, who is yet to sleep through even 1 night. If I’m lucky, he’ll wake up once, but a really bad night (like last night) will have him awake pretty much from midnight through to 6am. Yay me.

Alex also decided to pop both his bottom teeth at 5.5 months old. That then explained the gawd awful week that was experienced, in that he restlessly slept, cried, moaned and wanted no one but me. The worst night was the Thursday, in that he woke at 10pm, and didn’t stop moaning and being miserable until 6am. When he promptly fell fast asleep. Just as I needed to get up for work. Yeah, I don’t remember much about that Friday. I do however remember going to change his nappy on the Saturday morning, and as I bent down to get a nappy from underneath the change station and I placed my other hand on his chest, he pulled my hand up to mouth to munch on my fingers and I thought to myself HELLO! That doesn’t feel quite right?! And there they were, 2 little pearly whites, poking up out of his gums. Well I think Maddie thought I was an idiot, and Morgan-Lee (my eldest) thought I had finally lost my mind, as I scooped Alex up into my arms and proceeded to dance across our bedroom, singing at the top of my lungs at how proud I was of my boy with his ‘toofies’. At least there was a reason for me looking like the back end of a bus had rammed me face first for that week.

There are some days when I wake up out of my hazy doze, and it hits me that I’m a mom to twins. That I have 3 children. That my eldest, my beautiful, enigmatic, energetic, amazing, wondrous, humongous ball of energy daughter, is going to be 6 in 2.5 months time. I remember when she was coming close to her 1st birthday, thinking to myself “where on earth has the time gotten to”, and here I am again, almost 5 years later thinking the same thing.

i wish you enoughI saw a post a few days back, which basically stated that the day a woman becomes a mother, is the first day of the rest of her life, that her heart beats outside of her chest. I couldn’t agree more. Whilst I want my children to experience life first hand, I also want to protect them, cocoon them, cushion them. I want only the best for them, only happiness for them, only love for them. But, if they have only the best, only happiness and only love, life will be untrue for them, and to them. There’s a speech out there in the universe, and I can’t remember who wrote it, but it’s very similar to the poem written by Bob Perks called I Wish You Enough.

So, in another 6 months time you’ll read about me frantically planning the twins’ 1st birthday party (yes I’m already thinking about it!) and how I can’t believe that this has happened, and that that has happened. But that’s life for you; throwing you curve balls and taking your breath away. Making you stop and question, giving you room to breathe, and also showing you several wtf moments, all throughout your day!

2015 has been crazy and tumultuous; new babies, new jobs and new schools.

I can’t WAIT to see what 2016 brings us 🙂



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