horse dovers

The husband and I were lying in bed last night, him reading his book and me almost passed out.  I heard this little snicker, and I felt him giggling.  I rolled over and looked at him quizzically, then asked what he was laughing at.

“Hors d’oeuvres.” he snickered

On our first wedding anniversary in 2010, he spoilt me by taking me to a rather nice restaurant in the heart of Durban, called the Roma Revolving Restaurant.  As you dine, the restaurant rotates 360°, giving you the diner, a fantastic view of Durban and her harbour, which is especially gorgeous in the evening.  As we were looking through the menu, my husband so genuinely asked me what horse dovers were.  I looked at him, cocked my head to the side and blatantly went HUH?!  Horse dovers he repeated.  Horse dovers.  Ok, horse dovers.  I opened my menu to the page that he was on, and instantly burst out laughing.

Horse dovers = hors d’oeuvres

My husband does not have the best grasp of the English language;  his spelling and grammar is atrocious, and his idioms are the things of a great comedy, but that night will forever remain etched in our memories as a good night, a good memory.

Sometimes it really is the little, silly things that remind you of the bigger things that you should be grateful for.


to my unborn babies

Earlier this week, your daddy and I found out that there isn’t just one of you in there, but two!  I would be lying if I didn’t say that I wasn’t really a little scared.  I’m still battling to grasp the concept of 2 little beings growing inside of me.

I’m worried where we’re all going to fit;  in the car, in our house and in life in general.  I picture myself popping out to the shops with a baby on each hip, M-L walking next to me, my hair a total mess (that’s actually nothing new), baby ‘stuff’ on my shirt and most likely my pants, one (or knowing my luck both of you) will be crying for something, and it really is so much for me to take in right now.

My worst fear right now is that people will see me as ungrateful, when that is so far from the truth!  I am feeling truly blessed at the fact that there are 2 of you in there;  I have friends desperate for children, to have their own little person to love, and here I am, blessed with the 2 of you, and your big sister!  I mean WOW!

But it’s not going to be easy little ones.  It’s a daily, let alone monthly struggle in our household.  Daddy is a hardworker, and he does everything in his power to provide for us.  I’m working 2 jobs and your big sister even has chores!  But one thing we have an abundance of, is love and hugs and kisses and laughter and smiles.  We may not be the richest family with regards to financial wealth, but we are beyond rich with our love.

So babies, mommy’s scared.  Mommy has even cried.  Mommy actually laughed for almost 4 hours straight when she found out that there were 2 of you in there.  But most of all, mommy loves you so very much, and can’t wait to meet you next February.

All my love


i forgot

On the 9th of July, it was 3 years since my Gogo (grandmother in isiZulu) passed away.  And I forgot.  I don’t know how I forgot;  she is constantly in my thoughts, I knew the 3rd anniversary of her passing was coming up.  And then today, I realised that I had totally forgotten about it.

My gran was one of the healthiest people that I’ve ever known.  She walked on a daily basis, she ate healthily, watched her cholesterol and lived an overall healthy lifestyle.  She emigrated to the UK in July 2009;  I saw her for the last time on the 19th of July and she flew out on the 20th.  She passed away from bowel cancer on the 9th of July, 2011.  I had seen her once or twice since 2009 via Skype, and then we had emailed as well, but it wasn’t the same.  She also saw M-L once via Skype, when she was about 4-6 months old, I’m not too sure of the dates.  But I forgot about the anniversary.  How could I forget?

I’m not that great with people’s birthdays (thanks Facebook :) ) but  for some morbid reason, I’m really good with death dates.

24 October 2000 – my Nana passed away (cancer)
24 July 2004 – my ex-boyfriend’s (now dear friend) mom passed away (cancer)
14 June 2008 – a school friend was murdered in a hijacking (shot in her chest)
09 July 2011 – my Gogo passed away (cancer)

Perhaps it was due to everything happening in my life at the moment;  on the 3rd anniversary I was pregnant, but we didn’t know that it was twins but even still it was weighing on my mind.  Financial stress, car stress, but none of those factors should have allowed me to forget such an important date.  I cannot allow my life to overshadow the other things going on around me.

Gog’s, I think about you almost every single day.  I miss you, and I love you dearly.

I’ll be seeing you.


double trouble

I consider myself a blessed woman.  I have a roof over my head, a loving husband (most days) a gorgeous daughter whom I love with everything that I am, and a wonderful, supportive family.

Funny thing, family.  Especially on the genes side of things.

We always knew it was a possibility.  It has happened on both the husband’s side of the family, and mine.  The chances were high.  But until I saw those 2 little heartbeats yesterday, I honestly never thought it would happen to me.

Double trouble is on the way!

Double trouble is on the way!

Twins, arriving end Feb, 2015.

I’m going to go and sit in the corner for the rest of the day.


i’m a baaaaad momma

Last week Friday I had to leave home earlier than normal, because I had agreed to fetch my one manager from a car dealership where he was dropping his car off for a service.  This meant that I had to leave at 06h30 at the very latest.  At the moment, it’s only just starting to get light at 06h30, so you can only imagine how un-light it is at 06h15, which is when I woke M-L to have a bath.

Now I’d had a quick shower before running her bath. Well I thought it was a quick shower, because when I ran her bath, it was bordering on arctic.  Actually it was lukewarm, but by the time she got into it, yup, it was cold.  I felt so awful;  my poor child sat shivering in the bath whilst I washed her quickly, this ‘how-could-you-do-this-to-me-mommy’ look on her face.  5 minutes prior to her bath, she was tucked up warm in bed!  As I was rinsing her off, she asked me through chattering teeth, “am I going to Nana’s house today mommy?” to which I had to continue to be a bad mommy, and say no;  you’re going to school.  Oh the look on her face just broke my heart!  A cold bath and then not going to Nana’s house – most definitely not my best mommy moment!

M-L loves school, but she loves her Nana’s house more.  Yesterday I took a day’s leave, and I asked her whilst we were lazing in bed if she wanted to stay home with me, or if she’d like to go to school.  Yup.  She chose school.  She then promptly reminded me about the ‘cold’ bath that I ran last week, as I was drying her off from her bath yesterday.

Baaaaaad momma.  Bad, bad momma!


the very inspiring blog award

I mostly write whatever rubbish exits from brain via my mouth, so to be nominated for a blog award that has the word ‘inspiring’ in it, is pretty cool with me :)

I have honestly never thought of myself as inspiring, rather as someone who just tries her best to say it like it is, all of the time.  It’s not always easy, as being a softie by nature, I absolutely hate hurting people, but when pushed beyond my limits, the bitchiness is strong in me!  And the bitchiness is always at its strongest where my family are concerned, ESPECIALLY my daughter.

The awesome Miss C very kindly nominated me (on the 30th of June – shhhhhhhh!) for this blogging award, and you will not be disappointed when you head on over to her blog-o-sphere :)

Ok, here are the rules for this blogging award:

  1. Thank and link the amazing person who nominated you
  2. List the rules and display the award
  3. Share seven facts about yourself
  4. Nominate 15 other amazing blogs and comment on their posts to let them know they have been nominated
  5. Optional: Proudly display the award logo on your blog and follow the blogger who nominated you

Ok, so here it goes;  7 facts about moi…

  • I don’t like the dark.  At 28 years old, I still have a night light, and only at about 3am every morning do I turn it off.
  • I have an EXTREMELY overactive imagination.  I think that’s why I still have a night light.
  • I scare really easily.  I become absorbed completely in whatever I do, that someone just has to say boo!, or touch me on the shoulder and you’d swear I’d seen a ghost.  It’s quite pathetic really.
  • I have 3 favourite junk foods;  Cheas Naks, Creme Soda and Nikki Bars.  All made in good old South Africa, and whenever I’m having a really crappy day, they always make me feel better.  Well, any junk food in general does that I suppose, but those 3 are my favourites ;)
  • I have 3 siblings, but am an only child.  My parents divorced when I was 10 months old (hallelujah – I still say it was the drugs of the ’80′s that got them together in the first place ;) ) and both remarried;  my mom had 2 children with my stepdad, and my father had 1 child with my now former step-mom.
  • Over the years, I have gone from a social butterfly, to happily sitting at home the whole weekend, quite content with doing nothing.  Yes, maybe I’m wasting my life, but it’s my life and I like doing nothing.  If I can do it at home, I will.
  • They say that sarcasm is the lowest form of wit;  hell at least I have some wit then!  My sense of humour is often seen as insulting and offensive, when I honestly don’t mean it that way.  I just tend to say it like it is, or just say it without thinking!!!  What generally gets me out of trouble is the look of absolute horror on my own face, and the fact that I slap my hand over my mouth so quickly, not even believing what I’ve just said.

And now, to nominate 15 other bloggers.  Wow, that’s like, a whole lotta work.  Oh wait, I didn’t mention in my facts that I am EXTREMELY lazy.  Like I even shock myself at how lazy I am.  I really do follow such awesome bloggers (like duh) so I’ll see what I can rustle up here…

  1. Drinking Tips for Teens
  2. Outlaw Mama
  3. Not a Punk Rocker
  4. Rarasaur
  5. Cee’s Photography
  6. Whispers of a Barefoot Med Student
  7. The Blessed Barrenness
  8. A Little Bit of Lee
  9. Stuphblog
  10. safrindian
  11. Mommy Man
  12. cupcakes and sailors
  13. The Jolly Jammer
  14. Twinfamy
  15. 2Summers

Ok, if you think that I’m now going to go to all 15 of those blogs (again) to tell them that they’ve been nominated, you obviously don’t know me at all!  Hopefully they see the referrals under their stats, and if not, meh.  Doesn’t really phase me.

I couldn’t find the award picture, so this will just have to do…


i can’t describe this anger

I am an animal lover. No, this isn’t a post about animal abuse, or being vegan (which I’m not), but you need to know that I’m an animal lover. I’m so much of an animal lover, that when my husband wouldn’t allow our 2 smaller dogs onto the couch a few weeks back (he was in a mood) I promptly got off the couch and sat with them on the floor for about 20mins.IMG_20140620_190404

When my husband and I decided to find our own place in 2011, our priorities about our new home were the same; it had to be pet friendly, with enough space for our 4 legged kids to roam around comfortably in. And as luck would have it, we found a great place, 7km up from my mom’s, with MORE than enough space for our kids.

What angers me, what infuriates me, what makes me want to physically assault people, is when I read classifieds, or see fliers put up for people URGENTLY looking for a good home for their ‘BELOVED’ pet, because they’re moving and can’t take them with them. I’m sorry, but what? Oh, you’re ‘heartbroken’ and ‘only the best home will do’. Surely your home, your pet’s home, is the best home? It sickens me that you have made the decision to move into a place that does not accommodate animals, and that you obviously do not think that your animals complete your family. Without my pets, I wouldn’t be whole. My husband and I are still battling with the loss of Axle, our 4 legged boy, who left us so suddenly on July 24th, 2012. We made it a prerequisite that our new home would be pet friendly, and it wasn’t that hard to find a place that was within our budget, that had everything that we needed. Now, with person no 2 on the way, we’re actually short a room in our house, but are not moving because a) we are happy where we are, b) M-L will share her room with her sibling and c) I doubt that we would find anything within our budget, that had enough space for the 4 of us PLUS our 4 legged children. Oh, and our 10′s of rabbits. And our koi. And our pigs. And our one chicken. And and and.

I do understand that it’s not that clear cut; sometimes things happen and you are stuck for choice and absolutely have to move. But I also believe that some people just give up too easily; advertise their ‘wonderful, part-of-the-family’ pets too quickly. I myself had a ‘moment’ earlier this year; Daisy, my Daschund x Jack Russell attacked and killed one of my baby rabbits, a very special rabbit and I absolutely lost it. I even went so far as to advertise her ‘for free’ on Facebook, to ‘a loving home’. I almost instantly regretted my decision, as at the end of the day, Daisy did what was natural to her. It’s like when we adopted Daisy last February, and she ‘attacked’ the husband a few days into having her, and he phoned me absolutely fuming, telling me to find another home for her blah blah blah, and then about 3 hours later he phoned me back, saying that again, it wasn’t Daisy’s fault; she was in a new environment, new animals, new smells, and her family for the past 4 years was no longer there. Yes, the husband and Daisy still have their moments, but it’s so much better now, because we gave it some time.

A pet is a lifetime commitment; THEIR lifetime, not yours. And that brings me to another point; if something were to happen to you today, tomorrow, next week or next year, are your pets taken care of? Mine aren’t, and that scares the bejeezus out of me. Pets are so cute and cuddly and awesome and wonderful when they’re young, but they too grow old. They too get joint pain, they too go grey. They too feel the pain of losing a loved one, trust me, I know. Your pet gives you their absolute; why don’t you?

If your pet is not one of the priorities in your life, are you sure you’re ready for one?